Will the Real Spiderman Please Stand Up?
by PearlyJammer
Summary: On a camping trip, Logan reveals the truth about the 'real' spiderman. COMPLETE!
1. Default Chapter

Title:  Will the Real Spider-Man Please Stand Up? 

Author: Autumn 

E-mail: autumnleaves@autumnpenguins.com

Summary: Logan reveals the truth about the 'real' Spiderman. 

Disclaimer: The Characters belong to Marvel and Fox, not me,,,,, *** sigh *  **The lyrics belong to 'The Cure'

Archives:  DDFH, Autumn's Penguin Emporium others please ask 

Category:  Humor and horror, odd combo, but there you have it. 

A/N:  This is mainly inspired by the Cure's 'Lullaby' video, which is creepy enough to induce nightmares to even the, most veteran horror fan.

Set about 4 years after the first movie.  

***************** 

  
On candystripe legs the spiderman comes  
Softly through the shadow of the evening sun  
Stealing past the windows of the blissfully dead  
Looking for the victim shivering in bed  
Searching out fear in the gathering gloom and  
Suddenly!   
A movement in the corner of the room!   
And there is nothing I can do   
When I realise with fright   
That the spiderman is having me for dinner tonight!  
  


          Life at the mansion had been surprisingly easy for Logan to adjust too.  He'd stopped chasing ghosts two years ago, and had finally came back to the one place he wanted to call home. He knew as well as the next person did that he didn't come home for Jean.  He'd come back for the girl with the tags.  She had also been acclimated to mansion life rather quickly and had developed close relationships with Jubilee, Kitty, St. John and Bobby among others.  Rogue had had no lack of a social life and had a semi-serious boyfriend when Logan returned.  

          He didn't expect her to be waiting for him like a little girl waiting for her favourite uncle to come home.  A quick 'hi Logan' was all he got from her before she swept out the door with her boyfriend.  Scott found the entire situation funny he'd poked jibes at Logan resembling a lovesick puppy, rather bravely in many mutants' opinions.  Logan got over it eventually and settled down into a 'friendly' relationship with Marie.  He wanted more, everyone could see it, even Raymond, Marie's boyfriend knew it. In fact, the only one who seemed oblivious was the object of Logan's affections herself.  

          Raymond eventually grew deeply jealous over Logan and Marie's friendship.  When he gave her an ultimatum, Marie walked away from him and he was gone from her life.  That finally gave Logan the chance to pursue a romantic relationship with Marie.  After nearly a year of chasing her, she finally consented to date him, and they'd been together ever since.  In that time, Logan had found himself wanting to be near Marie as often as possible.  The untouchable girl had stolen his heart, and for once in his life, he didn't mind the complications that came with that. Involvement with Marie meant spending a lot of time with the younger kids the mansion housed.  She was a favourite with nearly every child and Logan was willingly drug along to several field trips, school functions and camping trips.  

          He was currently assembling one of the four pup tents that were to be scattered around the campsite.  Marie and he would be settled comfortably in a four-man tent, but the kids would be in two man tents, as they requested.  The kids were all between 8 and 11 so it was still safe enough to have the sexes mixed as there were at least two pairs of best friends that consisted of a girl-boy duo.  Marie had already assembled the larger tent as well as two of the smaller tents before she moved over towards Logan to assist him.  

                 "Face it Logan, there's just some things you're not good at."  Marie grinned as she took in Logan struggling with the tent.  

          "Fair enough darling," he began as he pulled a nearly transparent scarf from his pocket and kissed her.  "But I am good at some things" he grinned, leaving Rogue to finish the tents.  

          That evening as dusk settled, the eight kids and Marie had all changed into their pyjamas and were settled around the fire roasting, hot dogs, marshmallows and pickles.  The children happily stuffed their face, chocolate and graham cracker crumbs smudged on most of them until they were all stuffed.  Inevitably, the interest of the kids wavered in the direction of ghost stories.  "I've got one!" A little girl named Genavive said excitedly.  

          "I do too."  Jeff cried out.  

          "I want to hear Logan tell a story," Jessyca said shyly.  

          A chorus of 'me too' followed the girl's statement.  

          "What do you say Logan, gonna grace us with a tale?" Marie asked with laughter in her eyes.  

          Logan returned her smile before setting his face to a more serious look.  "I gotta warn you, its scary.  Probably too scary.  Ah, forget it" he said, getting up and acting like he would leave the circle.  

          "We're brave!  We can handle it!"  A boy shouted. 

          "Please Mr. Logan."  Jeff pleaded.  

          Logan turned around and sat himself back down around the campfire.  "Alright, but you've gotta promise that you are not going to come crawling into our tent if I tell you the story."  

          "We promise!" the kids voiced immediately.

          "This is a true story.  Its about me and Marie and Spiderman."  Logan began gravely. 

          "That's not scary!  Spiderman's a hero, we saw the movie!" Genevive said in indignation.  

          "You don't know the story about the real Spiderman" Logan stressed.  

          The kids were all quiet as Logan dove into the story.   "Marie and I had been sent out to investigate a supposed kidnapping.  It was one of the kids from the school, so of course we hurried over."  

*********** 

          Logan and Marie crept silently out of the range rover.  They'd located the caves with relative ease and now it was just a manner of finding their charge and getting the hell out of there.  It was easier said than done.  Neither of them had any experience spelunking and the entrance to the cave appeared to be a good 45 feet below ground. Not for nothing were they X-Men.  Rogue retrieved a gun from the trunk of the vehicle that would shoot an anchor to embed into the hardest of rocks.  It would leave them a rope to climb down and an avenue of escape.  

          Rogue quickly descended into the cave, and was followed by Logan moments later.  They found themselves in pitch darkness.  "You wanna split up or stay together down here?" Logan asked. 

          "I don't think its such a good idea to split up in a cave. Its dark, there are probably plenty of holes all over the place, one of us could trip and get hurt." Rogue said.  

          "You're just afraid of the bats." Logan teased.  

          "No, I was just trying to save you the trauma of trying to find yourself around in the dark.  We all know you're afraid of it.  Remember that incident with Scott?"  

          "I'll get something just as good on him." Logan muttered. 

          "Lets just find her and get out of here Logan.  This place gives me the creeps." 

          "Chicken."  Even in the dark, she could see his smirk. 

          The pair walked in silence for about 70 feet, when Logan slyly took her hand in his.  Rogue turned her flashlight towards him so he could see the smile on her face.  It was a special moment for the new couple, but an unforgivable moment of weakness for the X-men.  Had they been looking, they would have seen the large figure slowly descend from the roof of the cave.  "Welcome to my parlour, said the spider to the flies" an unpleasantly raspy voice hissed.  

          A shot of tight white binding shot forth and the two X-Men found themselves meeting the ground…….

TBC……


	2. The Mask Comes Off!

  
Quietly he laughs and shaking his head   
Creeps closer now   
Closer to the foot of the bed   
And softer than shadow and quicker than flies   
His arms are all around me and his tongue in my eyes 

            Xavier was worried.  He'd sent out two of his finest over three hours ago, and had had no word from them yet.  Logan and Rogue worked together efficiently and more often than not were off on a mission and back home before dinner.  He had chosen them to go after what appeared to be a missing child fully expecting them to retrieve him and be back.  A quick scan of Cerebro had shown that the child was nowhere to be found.  Charles knew that it could mean that the boy was unconscious and hastily set his X-Men off to the location he had been given.   

            Unbeknownst to him, the boy had indeed been unconscious, but had only been in danger of falling off the top bunk bed.  His arm hurt when he woke up and he rubbed it, surprised to see a small yellow bruise.  Jamie hopped off his bed and went in search of Dr. Grey.  He needed a teacher to take him down to the medical lab and he knew that Professor Xavier's office was close by.  

            "Come in" the cultured accent, said when he heard the soft knock on the door.  

              "Ah Jamie.  Good to see you back here safe and sound.  Where are Logan and Rogue, do you know?"  

            The boy looked puzzled.  "No sir.  I haven't seen them since last Friday, when I had class with Miss Rogue."  

            "Where have you been all day?"  Charles asked carefully. 

            "Well sir, I have been asleep.  I know it's late, I'm sorry." He said, realizing he was probably going to get into trouble. 

            "No need to apologize, but I must know, did anything unusual happen last night?"  

            "No sir.  But when I woke up the door window was open, and there was this on my arm" he said pushing the shirt up above his elbow so Charles could see the bruise.  

            "It looks like it did when Dr. Grey did those tests on my blood."  

            "I see. Thank you Jamie.  Now if you'll excuse me, I have something urgent that needs attending too."  The Professor said, trying to mask his panic from his young charge.  

(Jean, Storm, Scott meet me in the lower levels immediately) Charles called them with his mind.  

A few minutes later the four were assembled near the place where the X-Jet lay.  "I'm afraid Rogue and Logan have been abducted.  I need you to retrieve them.  Exercise extreme caution.  I will explain how this came about as soon as you come back, but I fear that the time is pressing." Charles said.  

His team nodded and changed into their uniforms and departed to save their teammates. 

**********

  
"Be still be calm be quiet now my precious boy   
Don't struggle like that or I will only love you more   
For it's much too late to get away or turn on the light   
The spiderman is having you for dinner tonight"  
  


            "What the hell?"  Logan called out.  

            "Profanity doesn't become you Wolverine," the man hissed.  

            "Who the hell are you?"  

            "Lets just say I'm not a fan." he cackled madly. 

            Logan and Rogue struggled to look at one another but they found themselves bound tightly by the web-like material.  It was thin as gossamer, but strong as rope.  The creatures drug them further and further into darkness.  The farther into the cave they went, the colder it grew until they were hauled into a place where sunlight had never been.  The two superhero's had no idea what had them constrained so, but it certainly couldn't be natural.  Logan couldn't break it, and even Rogue with superhuman strength was defenceless against it.  

            A soft scuffling on the ground gave Logan the impression that whatever was holding them captive wasn't human.  No human covered as much ground as they had in such a short time.  Soon enough they found themselves coming to a stop.  A strange clicking sound was heard before Logan felt himself being pulled into an upright position, seconds later he felt rather than saw Marie next too him.  Everything was quiet for about ten minutes before that slightly maniacal laugh was heard again. 

            "What are you laughing at?" Rogue asked. 

            "Nothing, sweetbuns!  Just you made it so easy!" he said, giggling like a loon. 

            "Made what easy?"  

            "Oh I can't tell you that.  No, no dearie.  The game's not even begun, and I don't want you knowing my secret yet." the creepy, disjointed voice rasped. 

            "You're fuckin' nuts."  Logan said rather bravely considering the circumstances.  

            "You're not one to judge thief!" the creature said, coming close enough for spittle to hit Logan in the face.   

            "Thief?" Marie questioned.  

            "Yes, yes sweetbuns! He is a thief."  

                        Their captor dashed off into the cave laughing softly to himself.  When Logan could no longer hear him, he began struggling against the bonds desperate to free himself.  It was futile he was bound in the white web like material with no hope of escape.  "Logan what the hell is that thing?  Can you see it at all?"  Rogue asked quietly. 

            "No.  It's to dark in here for me to see anything.  All I know is it has more than two legs and smells somethin' fierce."  

            There wasn't any more time for them to discuss exactly what this thing was before it appeared in front of them again.  They heard what was unmistakably a match, and saw a flicker of light.  A series of candles was lit by the creature and eventually there was enough light to see what was in front of them.  They immediately wished that it had kept them in the dark.  The creature before them was hideous.  Logan had been right about it having extra limbs.  The creature had what appeared to be two normal legs as a human would, but where the stomach was two shorter legs grew downwards and touched the ground when it hunched over.  

            In addition, it had an extra set of arms growing out of where the pectoral muscles would be on the average human.  The contorted body seemed to be covered in either a black or brown fur of sorts and was adorned in badly torn clothing.  The head was normal sized, but had an extra set of eyes in the middle of its forehead and when it turned around to light even more candles, they saw an additional pair in the back of the man's head.  His face was pale, with wide black circles around the eyes and the fang.  The mouth had what appeared to be mostly human teeth and a set of dangerous looking fangs leaked out of its mouth.

            "You like what you see don't you?"  he asked, his eyes glittering towards Marie.  

            "Its, um different."  Marie said carefully, not wishing to incite anger in the strange being before her.  

            "Ya look like you were beat by about 100 ugly sticks" Logan said, clearly amused.  

            "I can give you the same look, Logan," the spidery creature said.  

            That immediately quelled Logan's soft chuckles.  He wasn't by any means a pretty boy, but that didn't mean he wanted a few extra sets of appendages.  

            "You were a human once.  What happened to you?"  Rogue asked, trying hard to keep the revulsion she felt out of her voice. 

            "I have been distorted by love.  I loved a lady once, and she wasn't faithful to me in mind and body." He said, the bitterness of his confession fresh in his mind.  

            "She wanted something that I couldn't be, and so I was driven to this.  I tried to change for her, and it went wrong.  But it's okay because I have her now."  

            He studied the face of the young woman for a moment before he set his eyes to a cold, disapproving glare.

            "What's the matter Rogue?  Don't you recognize me?" he asked in a voice that was now barely an echo of what it had once been.  

            Confusion fogged her mind before the terrible truth gripped her in an icy vice.  "Ra-raymnod?"              

********** 

TBC


	3. Unrequited

*** Disclaimer in Part One*** 

Previous parts can be found at:  www.autumnpenguins.com 

A/N: Sorry for the delay in this piece.  RL got annoyingly in the way or more important things.  

I now have an update list for my multi-fandom fanfic:  

autumnfic@yahoogroups.com

And I feel like I'm being eaten   
By a thousand million shivering furry holes   
And I know that in the morning I will wake up   
In the shivering cold  
  
And the spiderman is always hungry...

"Raymond?"  Marie repeated disbelievingly.  

"Clever girl." the creature hissed.  

"What the hell happened to you, ya weren't that ugly when I saw you last." Logan stated coolly.  

He was rewarded with a dose of venom that shot forth from the Spider man's large fangs.  A sizzling noise brought Marie's head around and she watched in horror as a patch of Logan's cheek began to burn away as if it had been touched with acid.  

Logan groaned in pain as his flesh disappeared.  Finally the stinging subsided and the familiar feel of his mutation at work took its place. His grimace of pain was replaced by a shit-eating grin as he watched the look of delight drop from Raymond's face as he witnessed Logan's once again flawless cheek.    

"If I can't cause you damage, at least I can cause pain" the angry partial arachnid hissed.  With a demonic glint in his eyes he leaned forward and unleashed a larger dose of venom that splashed across Logan's entire face.  

******

Elsewhere…

The scream ripped from Logan's throat was loud enough to be heard by the threesome at the head on the cave.  

"Looks like we found the right place." Scott said quietly, concern etched on his face.  

The three team members quickly secured a rope at the mouth of the cave.  If something happened to any of them at least they would have a way out.  Jean descended first closely followed by Jean and Storm.  The scream they'd hurried had all of them worried.  Logan wasn't one to express that he was in pain unless it was pretty acute.    

The silence that followed had the trio even more worried.  Wasn't it better to be screaming than silent after all?  Then again, it was Logan.  He couldn't be killed easily under ordinary circumstances.  They hadn't seen or heard a trace from Rogue though either, and she herself was a tough opponent.  Her physical strength alone generally ensured her protection.  Determined to reach them, the pace quickened.  When they came to a fork in the tunnel Ororo paused thoughtfully.  "It appears that a rather heavy object was dragged from here." She said pointing to imprinted lines on the cavern floor.  

Jean and Scott followed the weather witch and soon found themselves in a long winding tunnel.  Scott realized with concern that a quick escape would be relatively impossible should they need an immediate out.  He kept his thoughts to himself when a maniacal laugh cut through the air.  

"At least we know we're getting close." Jean said bemusedly.  

******* 

            "Raymond stop it already!" She shouted.  

            She watched in disgust as her ex continued to douse Logan with venom, wait for him to heal and start the process all over.  A sickening sensation was in the pit of her stomach from Logan's suffering and her blood was boiling at Raymond's perverse behavior.  

            "What exactly is the point of that?  You know Logan can heal."  

            "Yes, but that doesn't mean he doesn't feel pain" Raymond cackled madly.  

            Marie struggled to free herself again, but there was virtually no difference.  The bonds held her tight.  She thought desperately of another way to get them out of here.  Her eyes scanned the room, looking for anything that might aid in her cause.  There was a pile of what appeared to be a torn up mattress in the farthest corner of the cave.  Candles were strewn about all over the place as well as pieces of paper.  Glass beakers littered the floor, some with a little liquid inside them but most were empty.  She wondered how long he'd lived down here before refocusing her mind on the task.  

            The wall she and Logan were pinned too was smooth and cold. After careful exploration she was disappointed to find that there weren't any jagged edges to attempt to break the bonds on.  Rogue realized that the screaming had finally stopped and snapped her read around to look at Logan to see if he was all right.  The ugly mug of Raymond met her instead.  He stood less than a foot away, his eyes devouring her.  

            "I've missed you."  He said softly.  

            Logan growled.  "Once you're gone, she'll be with me again.  Your body can't hold out against my venom forever." The Spiderman rasped not taking his eyes off of Rogue.  

            "We'll be happy down here.  I'll make you like me, and you'll never want to leave me again Rogue."  

            "It's over Raymond, it has been for a long time.  Let it go."  Marie said carefully.  

            "It is for him." Raymond grinned maliciously with his contorted face.  

                        He scuttled off towards in the direction of the darkest corner of the cave and appeared to be searching for something.  

            Marie turned towards Logan, panic in her voice.  "Logan, can you hear me?"       

            He did indeed appear to be dead.  Ugly red welts had swollen nearly all of his face, and blood trickled slowly to the ground from some unseen wound.  She could see he was breathing, but it was shallow judging by the rapid rise and fall of his chest.  Clicking noises drew her attention from Logan and she saw the Spiderman advancing once again from the darkness, a flask gripped in his hands.  He stopped again in front of Marie.  

            "We'll be together again.  You and me, and this cave.  Nobody will interfere again," with this he shot an ugly look at Logan's prone form. "It'll be like old times. When you're like me, you won't want to leave."  His eyes glowed with excitement.  

            He studied her carefully.  "I think he should watch this.  It's his fault you know, if it weren't for him I wouldn't be like this.  So he can watch your transformation."  

            He advanced on her with the flask.  Marie abandoned all logical sense and fought again at bonds she knew she couldn't escape.  From the corner of her eye she could see Logan regain a sense of what was happening and he too feebly tried to escape the white strands.  It was good for nothing.  She was trapped, she was going to become disfigured and Raymond was right.  When she looked like that, she would never again want to see the light of day.  

            Grinning widely Raymond was at her side.  He raised the flask and was about to unscrew the cap when it suddenly flew out of his hands and smashed harmlessly against the opposite wall.  

            "NO!" He screeched.  

            Turning towards the source of this interruption, the Spiderman charged at the red haired woman.  She easily stopped froze him in midair.  Scott stepped from behind her.  "Close your eyes Rogue."  He said before focusing his visor.  

            A flash of red later and she was free.  Marie jumped from the wall and moved towards Logan.  His wounds had finally healed, but the welts were still there.  Scott quickly freed Logan too, as Raymond cursed, spit and screamed at them all.  

            "Careful Jean, he's poisonous."  Logan warned.  

            Logan unsheathed his claws and walked determinedly toward his target.  "You loose." He grinned at the Spiderman before plunging both sets of claws into the torso.  When Storm saw the condition of Logan she threw in a few complimentary lightning bolts to finish off the job. 

            Jean released her hold and the ugly creature fell to the floor writhing in pain.  The five X-Men turned towards the cave, relieved to be going home.  

**********  

"That's the real deal.  Not that candyass in red and blue tights." Logan finished to his rapt audience.  

"Alright, well now that Logan's had his fun.  It's time to hop into bed." Marie said, stroking Logan's arm lovingly.  

None of the kids moved.  "Oh, and I forgot to mention that he also comes after kids who don't listen." Logan said casually.  

The words had barely left his mouth when there was a scramble towards the little cluster of tents.  

"Logan, that was mean!" Marie admonished, laughing in spite of herself.  

"I know.  But we had to get them to bed, before we could get to bed." He said, saying the last part suggestively.  

A laughing, Marie pulled Logan off in the direction of their tent.  It was set a little ways away from the kid's tents, and with good reason. Settled comfortably in their two person sleeping bag, Logan pulled a small scrap of fabric from where he'd concealed it in the tent pocket earlier and began placing soft kisses on the back of Marie's neck.  He crept around to the front, and was rewarded when she turned around and arranged the fabric to fit between their lips.  

A few long kisses later, the pair found themselves settling in for a night of intimacy when a small scratching sound at the door interrupted them. "Miss Marie," the scared voice of Jeff came through the tent slightly muffled "can I come in there?"   

Marie shot an exasperated look at Logan.  "I knew that would happen," she mouthed. 

To her chagrin behind Jeff was a line of all of the rest of the kids.  All looking equally scared that the Spiderman would pop out of the nearby thicket of trees at any moment.  Logan and Marie got out of the tent while all of the kids piled into their own.  They hauled three of the pup tents over near their own and divided the kids up into new sleeping arrangements.  

Five kids piled into the adult tent with Marie while the other five piled pack into the pup tents with their heads facing the openings so they could clearly see Logan who had arranged the other two tents to face his.  He grumbled about having to sleep in a Little Mermaid sleeping bag, but there were no others available.  Genevieve had jumped at the chance to donate her sleeping bag and hopped into the adult bag with Marie.  

Eventually everyone calmed down enough to go to sleep and though there were many nightmares, no evil forces disturbed the little camp.  Unbeknownst to them however were four glittering eyes focused on the camp 200 yards away.  The figure rubbed two sets of scars protectively before hissing in the direction of the tents.  He gave a final malevolent look before creeping off into the forest.  

******  End    


End file.
